PTSD & Relational Trauma
Post-traumatic stress does not always originate from a single catastrophic event. For many high-functioning adults, trauma is relational—formed over time through chronic misattunement, emotional neglect, psychological control, or unstable attachment figures. These experiences shape the nervous system and one’s expectations of closeness, safety, and trust.
Relational trauma often presents subtly. Clients may describe persistent hypervigilance, emotional numbing, difficulty relying on others, or a sense of being “on guard” even in objectively safe relationships. Others experience intrusive memories, somatic symptoms, or a pattern of intense connection followed by withdrawal. Insight is usually strong; relief is not.
Unlike acute PTSD, relational trauma is frequently embedded in identity and relationship patterns. It can coexist with professional success, intellectual depth, and outward composure—making it harder to recognize and easier to minimize. Many clients have spent years adapting rather than healing.
In therapy, the work is not about revisiting the past for its own sake, nor about symptom management alone. It involves understanding how trauma lives in the body, the relational field, and the present moment. Attention is paid to pacing, consent, and emotional regulation, allowing change to occur without retraumatization.
Our work may include:
Differentiating past threat from present reality
Understanding attachment patterns shaped by early or repeated relational injury
Addressing shame, self-blame, and internalized responsibility
Restoring a sense of agency, choice, and emotional safety in relationships
This approach is well suited for individuals seeking trauma therapy in Palo Alto or San Francisco who value depth, precision, and a collaborative process. Rather than applying a standardized protocol, therapy is tailored to the complexity of each client’s history and inner world.
The aim is not to erase what happened, but to loosen trauma’s hold on the present—so relationships, intimacy, and self-trust are no longer organized around survival.