BeTogether Approach created by Nicole Ohebshalom, PhD
When Success Doesn't Equal Wholeness
You've built an impressive life. Career milestones, financial stability, maybe a family. From the outside, everything looks like it's working.
But underneath? Something feels off.
You're exhausted in ways sleep doesn't fix. Your relationship feels distant, or sex has become another item on a to-do list you're avoiding. You're going through the motions but can't remember the last time you felt genuinely alive, connected, or clear about what actually matters.
You might say you're "stressed" or "burned out," but it goes deeper than that. You're disconnected.
And here's what we know: You can't optimize, schedule, or think your way back to wholeness. You have to reconnect your way there.
What Is the BeTogether Approach?
The BeTogether Approach is the clinical framework we use at Ohebshalom & Co. Therapy to understand disconnection and guide reconnection across your entire life.
It's built on a simple truth: your life isn't made of isolated problems. It's an interconnected system.
When one part of you suffers, everything suffers. When one area reconnects, everything else has room to shift.
Most therapy focuses on fixing what's "wrong." The BeTogether Approach asks a different question: Where have you become disconnected—from your body, from yourself, from others, from desire, from meaning—and how do we restore that connection?
The Six Dimensions of Wellbeing
We assess and work across six interconnected dimensions of your life:
Physical Wellbeing
Your body, energy, rest, vitality, and physical health. The foundation everything else builds on.
Emotional Wellbeing
Your capacity to feel and express the full range of human emotions without shutdown or overwhelm.
Relational Wellbeing
The quality and depth of your connections with others. Being truly seen, safe, and supported.
Intellectual Wellbeing
Your curiosity, creativity, engagement with ideas and beauty. Mental aliveness beyond productivity.
Sexual Wellbeing
Your connection to desire, pleasure, intimacy, and embodied aliveness across your lifespan.
Spiritual Wellbeing
Your sense of meaning, purpose, and alignment with what matters most (not necessarily religious).
Why This Matters: The Ripple Effect
Here's what high-achievers often miss: these dimensions don't exist in silos.
When you're physically depleted, emotional access shuts down. When emotions feel unsafe, relationships stay surface-level. When there's relational distance, sexual connection disappears. When you've lost meaning, your body carries the weight.
Disconnection in one dimension creates disconnection everywhere else.
But here's the good news: reconnection works the same way.
When you start listening to your body, emotions become more accessible. When you build relational safety, desire has room to return. When you reconnect to what matters, everything you do starts to feel more aligned.
We don't treat your "sleep problem" separately from your "lack of desire" separately from your "relationship tension." We see the pattern underneath—and address the whole system.
The Five Levels of Connection
Within each dimension, we work at five different levels of connection:
1. Somatic Connection (Body ↔ Self)
Reconnecting to physical sensations, needs, and trauma held in the body. You can't think your way to wholeness—you must feel your way there.
2. Internal Connection (Parts ↔ Whole Self)
Integrating fragmented parts of yourself. Moving from inner conflict to inner coherence.
3. Relational Connection (Self ↔ Others)
Building secure, authentic relationships where you can be vulnerable and truly seen.
4. Sexual Connection (Embodied ↔ Intimate)
Reconnecting to desire, pleasure, and intimate partnership. Not performance—presence.
5. Existential Connection (Self ↔ Meaning)
Aligning your actions with your values and finding purpose beyond achievement.
All five levels work together. Healing isn't linear—it's integrated. When we restore connection at one level, it creates space for reconnection everywhere else.
How It Works in Practice
We start with assessment.
Through the BeTogether assessment process, we identify where disconnection has taken root. Which dimensions are depleted? Which patterns are present? Where would reconnection create the biggest ripple effect?
We create a tailored approach.
Your therapist matches evidence-based modalities to your specific pattern: EMDR for trauma held in the body, Emotionally Focused Therapy for relational wounds, IFS for internal fragmentation, Sex Therapy for intimacy reconnection. We don't use a one-size-fits-all approach—we meet you exactly where you are.
We work across the whole system.
As one dimension strengthens, we watch how it affects the others. Physical stabilization might unlock emotional access. Emotional safety might allow relational vulnerability. Relational repair might restore sexual aliveness. We're tracking the whole pattern, not just individual symptoms.
We measure what's shifting.
Over time, we reassess. Not to judge progress, but to notice what's changing. Where are you feeling more connected? Where is aliveness returning? What still needs attention?
Common Patterns We See
The Mind-Body Split
Physical and emotional wellbeing both low. You're disconnected from bodily experience and can't access feelings. Often from trauma or years of "pushing through."
The Intimacy Gap
Relational and sexual wellbeing both low. You and your partner feel distant. Sex is infrequent, mechanical, or avoided entirely. Love is still there—connection isn't.
The Achiever Pattern
Intellectual wellbeing high, everything else low. You've succeeded through cognition while neglecting body, emotions, relationships, desire, and meaning.
The Meaning Void
Emotional and spiritual wellbeing both low. Going through motions but nothing feels meaningful. Success feels hollow.
The Functional Freeze
Physical, emotional, and sexual wellbeing all critically low. Body numb, emotions shut down, sexuality offline. Often trauma-related or severe burnout.
These aren't diagnoses—they're disconnection patterns. And patterns can shift.
Who This Is For
The BeTogether Approach is designed for people who:
Look fine on the outside but feel disconnected underneath
Have tried therapy before but it stayed too surface-level
Want to understand the root of their patterns, not just manage symptoms
Are tired of treating problems in isolation when everything feels interconnected
Are ready to do real work—not looking for quick fixes or wellness fluff
Want therapy that's both emotionally attuned and intellectually rigorous
If you're a high-achieving individual or couple who's built an impressive life but lost connection along the way—this approach was designed for you.
What Makes This Different
We don't pathologize.
Nothing is wrong with you. You're not broken. You may be living out of coherence with your authentic self, and we help you find your way back.
We work with the whole person.
Not your anxiety. Not your communication problems. Not your low libido. You—all of you—as one integrated human being.
We understand high-achievers.
We know what it's like to have optimized everything except yourself. To have intellectualized feelings instead of feeling them. To have sacrificed connection for achievement and wonder why success feels empty.
We blend science and humanity.
Neuroscience-informed, evidence-based, and emotionally attuned. We bring theoretical precision to lived human experience.
We believe in integration, not correction.
Healing doesn't come from fixing isolated problems. It comes from restoring the connections that allow your whole system to work together again.
Ready to Reconnect?
The BeTogether Approach isn't about becoming a different person. It's about becoming more fully yourself—integrated, coherent, and connected across every dimension of your life.
If you're ready to stop managing symptoms and start addressing the whole pattern, we're here.
Schedule a consultation to learn how the BeTogether Approach can guide your path back to wholeness.
The BeTogether Approach was developed by Nicole Ohebshalom, PhD at Ohebshalom & Co. Therapy and is the clinical framework underlying all of our work with individuals and couples.